Everything at Once

by Sadie

I’m feeling very restless at the moment.

I want everything at the same time, but am unable to focus.

I want to travel the world, see as many countries as possible, go to Central America, to Cuba, faraway.

I want to be in a peaceful retreat, just focusing on my inner workings. Just sit with myself and learn to understand.

I want love. Belonging. Someone that makes me want to never look back or regret my choices.

I want to read plenty of books. Short stories, fiction, biographies. Everything that catches my eye. I want inspiration.

I want to write many words a day, whole pages, to pour out my feelings and thoughts and hopes. To make somebody care.

I start something, but it’s so hard to finish.

I want something to be good, real good, but I can’t bring myself to sit down everyday and work at it.

I want instant rewards. I don’t want to wait for anything.

I am exhausted. This uncertainty overwhelms me. Anything is possible, but that also means I can fail.

I just want to be happy and not worry for a while.

Maybe I need some rest…