The Easy Way Out
“The best way out is always through.” Robert Frost
Of course there is still a part of me that loves him (let’s call him K.), and probably will do so as long as I live. But the rest of me knows better and whenever I listen to that part, I mean really try to understand what it’s saying, I feel more content and much happier.
What I learned the hard way is that in life, you really need to get to know yourself as good as you can and accept yourself fully because if you don’t, you’ll cling to other things and people to make you feel complete and worthy. But there is no one in this world who could do that for you. You need to be able to be happy with yourself and your life without someone else to validate you and build you up if something goes wrong. If you do that, if you constantly look for other people to help you out of your misery, you’ll stay dependent and never get to know the self-healing powers that you actually possess.
Of course I could say: well, I really hope K. still loves me because then I could go back to him and start ignoring my real feelings again and basically deny myself and my own needs. But that’s not going to do the trick. It’s only going to make me feel even more miserable than before.
Life is about learning the lessons that present themselves and grow as a person in the best ways you can. It’s not about going back to things that aren’t healthy for you and that make you feel stuck and unhappy.
You could choose the easy way out whenever you’re facing a problem, and you probably often do that if you’re like me. You could just try to hide and stay as comfortable as possible while at the same time knowing that it’s like a ticking time-bomb. One day it’ll explode. And when that happens, you can go on blaming the ‘problem’, whatever or whoever that may be, or you can actually decide to see the part you played in it.
Because if you deny your own part, you’re also denying a part of yourself that wants to be heard. The part of you that is trying to help you out and show you the right way, even if that means it’s the hard way. It might be the hard way, but it’s also the way that’ll guide you to your own self and the things in life that’ll make you happy.
Remember that you have a choice which way to go.